Monday, December 3, 2012

The Day that has forever changed my relationship with...

I had to get bloodwork the other day. My phone was almost dead. Probably the worst possible thing that could have happened. I witnessed the absolute nastiest thing I could imagine. Something I shouldn't talk about it is so vile.

And older lady and her really old mother came in and stood at the counter. They were talking about the lunch they just had. No big deal, right? It was almost cute. For a minute.

I saw the daughter pull something out of her purse. It was a tupperware container. For a second I still had my innocence. I thought it was sweet she would bring the lab techs pudding.

I have been forever scarred. The lady informed the tech the sample was fresh and has not been frozen yet. I made a big mistake looking at the container again. I grabbed the trash can and ran into the hallway. When I returned all I could say was you need a new bag.

First of all, it is fucking gross to shit in a plastic container. Whatever sick twisted individual who thought it was acceptable to make that container clear needs his testicles sliced. There are no two ways about it, his ass should have been shot or at the very least he should have been caught on fire. That man is a dipshit.

Second of all, who the hell puts a pile of shit in their purse without wrapping it in plastic? I've used Tupperware. That shit leaks. I went batshit when gravy dripped in my fridge. I would have wrapped that package of anal carnage with a SAMs club sized package of trash bags and duct taped that bitch to a pole. No way in hell it would be seen, let alone just tossed all willy nilly like in my purse. People are freaks and nasty. This was the day that has forever changed my relationship with pudding.


  1. For the love woman, warn people that if they happen to be eating lunch while reading, STOP! Come back later. When my sandwich has digested and not able to come back into my mouth! And now lunch is over for today.
    I have now learned to never, ever buy Tupperware at Goodwill.

  2. And now I know why I never liked chocolate pudding!

  3. I don't know whether to laugh or cry!
    But I definitely would have puked as well. That is AWFUL. :(

  4. I gotta admit--just the image of this made me nauseous. The hubs and I always go to our doctor appts. together like two old farts. One time the nurse at the check- in counter asked the hubs LOUDLY in front of the packed waiting room if he brought in his "party pack". He's thinking in terms of beer and asked her what she meant. She (again loudly) says, "No sir--your urine and poop sample!" You should have seen the stricken looks on all the other patients in their chairs. I, on the other hand, almost fell off mine laughing.... sorry you had to be traumatized by the Tupperware--time to find some new disposable containers for your house.

  5. I hate to say it but I am glad you shared this. I didn't have to see it so I'm not scarred and it was HILARIOUS to read about.

  6. Wow, that is truly vile. I treat all samples like they are toxic waste, basically.

  7. ughhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! OMG!!! Is she insane??!?!?!! You poor thing! I would definitely have done the same as what you did!!

  8. LOL! I'm thinking they could have at least wrapped it in some festive paper. It is almost Christmas after all!